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There has been much conversation surrounding the dress—the now-infamous dress that has sparked outrage, judgment, defense, sermons, and side-eyes all at once. And as I watched the discourse unfold, my mind immediately went to the story of Esther.
In the Book of Esther, King Xerxes summons Queen Vashti to appear before him—many scholars believe unclothed or at least in a humiliating, objectifying way. Vashti refuses. Because of her disobedience, she is divorced and stripped of her title as queen.
What’s interesting is how this story is often handled from the pulpit.
Many of the same dignitaries and leaders who are now publicly condemning Dr. Karri Baby’s appearance will also stand in sermons and justify the king’s decision against Vashti. Her refusal is framed as rebellion. His response is framed as order. And rarely do we sit long enough with the complexity of that moment—or the cost of either choice.
So when I see Dr. Karri Baby at the center of public critique, I wonder if part of the truth is simply this: maybe she wanted to live a little. Maybe she wanted to have fun with "her husband".
But she must understand and recognize that it doesn’t exempt her from critique, it does remind us that freedom always comes with consequences—especially when lived out loud.
And this is where my own mixed emotions come in.
Because I am the woman who plays her rap music loud on the highway while wearing her prophet’s garments and ring. And sometimes on the way to church. I use it to attract people to me and witness.
I am also the woman who wears fitted, sexy gym clothes when I work out.
I am the woman who believes in holiness—and also believes in looking good for her husband.
And yes, there was a season in my life when I had fun breaking the rules. I enjoyed my freedom. I pushed boundaries. And I was also judged for it. But I don't know if I would have worn this dress.
Okay maybe for a night out with bae...
But in the past... I didn't pretend to be shocked when others had opinions. Sometimes I explained my reasoning and sometimes I didn't.
At the same time, I won’t pretend—I didn’t feel a check in my spirit. Not condemnation. Not discomfort. Because intention matters. Context matters. Covering matters. And while I firmly believe women should never be reduced to their bodies or their clothing, I also believe discernment is wisdom, not oppression.
Salvation is personal. Each of us must answer for our own convictions. That said, Scripture also reminds us to be mindful not to cause one another to stumble.
There is a tension there—because while we are not responsible for managing everyone else’s desires, we are called to walk in love, awareness, and accountability within our own communities.
And as Dr. Reid often says, when something is public, it becomes open to public opinion.
That doesn’t mean every opinion is right or righteous.
It doesn’t mean every critique is fair.
But it does mean backlash is part of visibility.
And we should allow room for conversation.
And let’s be honest—we are all adults here. I believe we can handle the sight of a sexy dress without losing our composure or our theology. Who knows, maybe next we’ll see Dr. Jamal Bryant preaching in sweatpants.
This moment isn’t about shaming a woman. It’s about acknowledging the tension many of us live in daily—the space between faith and fun, modesty and expression, freedom and responsibility.
And maybe the real question isn’t whether the dress was right or wrong.
Maybe the question is:
Are we prepared for the conversations, practices, and thoughts we have around sex or sexuality? Why did our minds automatically go there?
Are we prepared for the consequences of how we choose to show up in public spaces—and are we extending the same grace we hope to receive?
Are we prepared for the conversations about us around how we choose to show up in public spaces?
Because if we’re honest, most of us have been Vashti at some point.
And many of us have also worn the dress or the not so good looking thing that sparked talk.
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